As a lifelong pessimist, I’ve always argued that it’s a bad idea to look forward to things on the grounds that I always get let down, and have avoided feeling let down on many occasions because of this. Thank fuck, eh?
Well, in recent years, I’ve come to realise that being an optimism fares much better for me. Whilst I wasn’t being let down before, I failed to even consider the fact that with being an optimist, it also involves how you react to negative situations as well as positive ones!
If I’ve met someone new who I really like and hope it’ll work out with, the pessimist in me doesn’t want to get my hopes up for it all to go to shit soon enough. Seems fairly logical. But during that time, I’m not enjoying myself or this person as much as I could have been because I am thinking from the get go that it’s not going to work.
Taking the optimistic attitude and enjoying it while it lasts will mean that, retrospectively, my life will be more enjoyable, right? But what about if it DOES come to an end? I’ll feel let down and as if I got excited for nothing, right? Why be positive when the hurt caused by having the optimistic outlook could be so devastating?
Well, that’s actually still just being pessimistic, if you think about it. When something bad happens, pessimistic me might say “fuck it” and give up or just not bother on the grounds it was pointless to try, or silly to hope for the best. But the optimistic me would say “Hey, it didn’t work this time, but there IS someone out there for me!”. It’s not about KNOWING what’s going to happen, because in reality, you don’t know. You just don’t. So why waste your time surrounding yourself with negative thoughts, when those thoughts could be positive?
It won’t change what ACTUALLY happens, but it WILL change how you perceive these events, both positive and negative. As an optimist, you can bounce back and carry on and have faith that everything will be okay.
Because you know why? Everything’s going to be okay. Everything. Will. Be. Okay.
Why? It just has to be. It’s the only way.
It’s taken many stupid years of confusion and feeling horrendously low for me to realise the above. It also helped to have someone very much on my level to talk to, and to offer me some genuine advice for life. Thank you.